First Came Boys
I was pretty much crazy about boys for the minute that I noticed them in preschool. One particular boy caught my attention on the playground and the next thing I knew I was getting a talking to from my Momma about how it was not appropriate to kiss boys at school. My first “boyfriend” was a family friend named Ryan who proposed to me with a ring out of the bubble gum machine in kindergarten.
In 4th grade, I discovered how to flirt and used it on my first crush, Matthew Allen. My success in flirting with Matthew led to elementary years that were occupied with many of crushes, long phone calls about nothing at all, and perfecting my skills in penning a love note.
By the 6th grade, I had fully developed (girls, you know what I mean) and began to catch the attention of older boys which is the time period of dating that I call “the older the better”. My daddy was coaching my older brother’s baseball team and that created the ideal opportunity for my dating life. Boy, did I go through them. I had my first kiss with a boy named Justin behind the concession stand at the ballpark. I know, I was way too young to be kissing but this is what happens when you are going with older boys.
In 7th grade, I won the attention of a popular boy named Russell (who is now like a brother so it seems gross) and a whole group of girls who tried to beat me up daily because he liked me instead of them. I learned how cruel other girls could be and how much I liked being with someone who was protective of me, even though I was perfectly capable of taking care of myself. Clearly. Russell punched Chris for commenting on my behind. He got suspended and I got to go to the end of the year dance with his best friend instead.
In middle school, I discovered the bad boys. I was the ultimate good girl so, naturally, they were the perfect fit for me. I started going with Chris (yep, the same one Russell punched) who was surprisingly amazing to me but the allure of the bad boy had set in and I boyfriend hopped until I settled on Lee. Daddy loathed Lee and forbid me to go out with him so, of course, I rebelled and experience my first bad relationship. Lee and I went out for six long months. In the beginning, everything was great (as it always is) and then it turned into a jealous, controlling mess. I began to lie to my friends and family to be able to see him and tried to paint the picture of a great relationship. In the end, I became a desperate, self-conscious, unhappy mess until Lee finally broke up with me after I hung up the phone on him one night during an argument. Somewhere around making myself throw up my dinner and crying myself to sleep, I got myself together and vowed to never let anyone control my life again.
And then came love...
And then came love...